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63-Grandpa and Grandma get married

(Warning! This is just a little bit long and it is the final post of this series of stories.)

Grandpa and I started dating after he got back from his TDY in Germany. That would have been April 1969. As I mentioned in a previous story, Miss Tularosa, he was my escort for Armed Forces Day in May. We went steady. In October he asked me to marry him. I can’t remember the exact day in October; it’s been 39 years! I said, “Yes!” I told him that he had to ask my dad’s permission. I warned him that my dad liked practical jokes and could be in one of his rare moods and make light humor with him. I told him not to take my dad seriously. My dad could be intimidating too. Neil had hardly any sense of humor. He was very serious. He didn’t talk a lot either. We were totally opposite from each other. They do say that opposites attract! It’s true! I was social, chatty, talked a mile an hour and loved humor! This ‘opposite’ in our personalities made for some stressful and interesting first few years of marriage! I remember telling Neil one day, ‘it’s sink or swim, you have got to get a sense of humor!

I was so excited and told my mom I was engaged! I had just turned 19 the previous month! I thought I was so grown up! That was debatable! I was spoiled rotten and too independent for my own good! Neil was 22 years old. Then I told her that Neil was going to ask dad for his permission to marry me and I wanted mom to talk to him and to tell him to ‘behave himself’ and not give Neil a bad time. Neil is a serious person and doesn’t take joking too well. Mom told me that she would tell my dad to behave.

Well, the big day came. It was a Saturday and Neil had that day off and didn’t have duty. He worked in the Information Office and did PR (Public Promotion) work and conducted base tours, took care of brass that came on base, worked on the newspaper, etc. He was a Staff Sergeant. Neil arrived at the house. He drove a motorcycle. I had my own car. Dad was in the family room reading a paper. I went in the room with Neil because I knew my dad so well and I was not about to let him give Neil a bad time. It wasn’t that Neil couldn’t take care of himself, he really could, but I still wanted to keep an eye on my dad! I remember we both were standing and Neil said he wanted to talk to dad. He said that was fine. Then Neil just blurted it out, ‘I would like your permission to marry your daughter.’ Dad said, ‘Yes. I wish you good luck too. She’s as independent as the fourth of July and has a mind of her own.’ The two of them shook hands and we left the room.

“Whew!’ We breathed a sigh of relief! That was over with! My mom was in the kitchen watching and she said that both of us stood side by side so close together we looked like we were holding each other up for moral support and had serious looks on our faces and it looked as if we didn’t breathe!’ Later I told my dad I was so glad he didn’t give Neil a bad time. He said that he would not have done that, despite the fact that mom had talked to him. He said that marriage was serious business and it was not a time to make light of it.

That was a scary experience! We were both glad that part was over! We talked about a date for getting married. We originally wanted to get married the following spring 1970. Both of Neil’s parents worked and they had to request vacation time and they had children in school. Neil was the oldest, firstborn sibling. They wouldn’t be out of school until June. Well as things happen with military life, things can change in a moment’s notice. Neil was going to have to go on TDY back to Germany again. He found this out in November a month after we were engaged. He was going to leave right after New Year’s, sometime in January and not get back until the end of April or in early May.

Here’s where irrational thinking kicked in…Neil being gone for 3 to 4 months seemed forever to these two love sick kids. So what did we do? The only thing love sick people do…we decided to get married before he left so we could spend as much time together as possible! We told my parents and my mom was a real good sport. We would have the reception in January before Neil left for Germany. We were going to get married before Christmas! A whole month notice! Wow! We told Neil’s parents but there was no way they could make it for the wedding.

I wanted a temple marriage and Neil didn’t care either way. Neither his parents nor mine were sealed in the temple. I talked to our Bishop, who now was Bishop Roy Myers and he agreed we should have a temple marriage. That meant my parents had to be sealed in order to see us married in the temple. So my parents were going to be sealed too. I had a brother, Douglas, who had been married about 1-½ years to his wife Jan. They too were going to be sealed together. Then my siblings and I would also be sealed to my parents. We all had our interviews and temple recommends and off we went on December 23, 1969 to Mesa, Arizona. Neil and I had to leave a day earlier in order to get our marriage license in Phoenix, Arizona. We also had to get temple clothing for all of us. We all stayed at a little motel called The Utahan. We rented 3 rooms.

I have to say here before I continue that Neil had to get permission from his commanding officer on base to be married and have the time off. When you are in the military you don’t belong to yourself, you belong to Uncle Sam, the government! His commanding officer gave his permission and had papers typed up stating he had permission to get married and have time off to do so.

It was a beautiful day at the temple. It was warm and sunny and about 75 degrees. I remember that there were grapefruits on the trees and oranges on the trees. It didn’t feel like Christmas or winter!

The next day, December 24th, there were 13 of us that were brides at the temple that day. The session was jam-packed. We were all kind of nervous as none of us had ever been through the temple before. Some friends of grandpa and I, Dennis and Barbara Alton who had been married in the Salt Lake Temple the prior December 1968, went through with us. (Dennis was also in the Air Force and stationed at Holloman AFB where Neil was stationed. Barbara and I graduated from high school together.) So we all learned together that day. The sealer sealed my parents first and then my brothers and I to my parents. Then he sealed Doug and his wife Jan. Then he married and sealed Neil and I together for time and all eternity! It was a beautiful moment! The temple sealer said what a special day it was not only for him but also for our family, because now we were all sealed as a family together for time and all eternity!

Prior to our going to the temple, my mom and I had picked out a wedding gown but because I decided on a temple marriage, the top of the wedding dress was not high enough and temple standard so we did not end up buying that wedding dress. I rented one from the temple. It was satin and an antique white. Do I regret not having my own wedding dress? Not really. I did feel a little bad that I never had a wedding dress to show my own children, but that was a decision we had to make when I got married. There wasn’t time to find another dress because we chose to get married so quickly.

I can remember as Neil and I went outside the temple as man and wife I said, “I don’t feel married. I am married, but it doesn’t feel like I’m married. I’m Mrs. Neil R. Guptill now.” We laughed.

All of our family went to Abby Pizza Hut for dinner. My parents had asked us where we wanted to eat and we wanted to have pizza. They had a treasure chest by the door as you left and you could pick out toys, stuffed animals, etc. as a gift when you left. We picked out a green reindeer that had red felt antlers. I sill have that reindeer to this day and we put it out every year during Christmas.

We only had 3 days for a honeymoon as Neil had to be back to duty on base. One week after we were married the base cancelled his unit’s deployment orders to Germany. What luck! We were so happy! We had a wedding reception on January 22, 1970, almost one month later. A lot of people came and we got everything! We were so blessed and so thankful! We lived with my parents for the next 9 months to save money.

I should add a little note here... back in my day wedding receptions served punch, cake, mints and nuts. It's not like today where you serve almost a meal. My colors were peach, yellow and white. Peach and orange were my favorite colors then. The punch was orange sherbet with 7up. It was yummy! My corsage and mom's were a burnt orange. My skirt was an orange plaid with a white blouse. There were little sugar turtle doves on the cake with some baby yellow roses made from frosting. There is also something else I remembered. We had two 8-foot tables set up for the wedding gifts. The Bishop's wife, Sis.Meyers, was in charge of receiving the gifts. She also 'opened' them all to have on display. A sticker with a number on it was placed on each gift accompanied by the wedding card. We made out like bandits! We only had to purchase an ironing board. In my day, the gifts were opened so people could see what you received. It was a bit anticlimactic in that it took away the fun and surprise that someone had the fun of opening your gifts. I have to say that I really like it today that the gifts are opened by the 'bride and groom!'

Neil got out of the service in September 1970. Neil was a Staff Sergeant (an E-4) so that entitled him to have all of his household goods shipped back to Oregon for free! He was offered a re-enlistment with a bonus and one more rank, Tech Sgt., but he turned them down. Neil had signed up for college on the GI Bill and got out of the service on the ‘Early Out’ Program to get into school. He only got out two months before his 4-year enlistment was up. School started about mid-September and we had to get back to Oregon.

We moved back to Oregon where his family lived. We packed our car with things we needed and shipped the rest. This was the first time I had ever met his folks and they welcomed me in with open arms and I really liked his parents. We got along very well. She has always been a great mother-in-law! His dad was great too. His mom and dad had an Open House for us and a lot of people came. It was held at their home. We received a lot of gifts. We lived with his family for a month before we moved into an apartment.

Neil was enrolled and went to Mt. Hood Community College to get his associate degree in engineering. He went on the GI Bill. They paid for his tuition. I worked at US Bank as a secretary and paid all the other bills. His last year he worked part time as a school bus driver and that extra income helped us out too.

Neil graduated in June 1972 and went to work for the state of Oregon. I still worked until the following year. I quit work one month before we had our first born child, a daughter Michelle, who was born on March 20, 1973.

December 24, 2008 we celebrated our 39th wedding anniversary! In some ways, it doesn’t seem like it’s been that long and other times it really has been a long time. I’m excited for this year, because on December 24, 2009 we will celebrate our ‘40th’ wedding anniversary. I’m going to look forward to that date all year!

Grandpa is 61 and I am 58 years old. Where did the time go so quickly! We have 6 beautiful children, Michelle, Julie, Lisa, Douglas, David and Kirsten. Five are married. Michelle and Christopher Gleed and they have four beautiful children -Tyler, Lauren, McKenna and Brooklynn. Julie and Bob (Robert) Ward and they have four beautiful children -Quintin and Brynnly (from Bob’s first marriage), Zachary and Braxton. Lisa and Jordan Newby and they have two beautiful children - LaRue and Matilda and another baby girl due this March 2009. Both our sons were married last year in August 2008. David and Angela Guptill were married on August 8, 2008 (08/08/08). Douglas and Ashley Guptill were married August 29, 2008. We love all of our children, sons-in-law and daughters-in-law and our beautiful 10 grandchildren with number 11 due in March! Kirsten is our youngest daughter and she is a special angel and special needs daughter. Kirsten will turn 19 on April 2nd this year. She lives at home with us, her mom and dad, and she brings us a lot of joy!

We look forward to many more years together and with more grandchildren and great grandchildren!

God bless this family! It is to Him whom we owe everything and are grateful for all the multitude of blessings that have been ours and all the blessings yet to come.

THE END

Author Note-
(This concludes the final chapter of ‘When Grandma Was A Little Girl.’ I hope my children have read these stories to their children. I wrote these stories so my grandchildren would know what my life was like when I was growing up. I hope they will enjoy the stories as much as I did writing about them!)